If you’re a mom you’ll know the struggle of not only getting time to spend on yourself but also, not feeling guilty about it. When I first became a mama I made a pledge to myself that I would continue to take care of myself too. I’m not just a mom, I’m Stacey too. I vowed to never forget that.
I am pampering yourself’s biggest fan. I believe that EVERYONE should make time for themselves. Not just to take care of themselves physically but to take care of themselves mentally and emotionally. Every time I have a pamper night/day/session I feel refreshed, ready to take on the next day. So, have you had a pamper session recently? If the answer is no… Give yourself a gigantic kick up the bum and read on because this one, is for you!
Pamper sessions really can be as short/long, complex/simple as you like. DIY gives you the ability to run things exactly how you want them to. Make the most of it!
Get all the products that you want, if it’s just a face mask then that’s cool. You can stay simple or you can go alllll out. I recommend going all out, spoil yourself, you deserve it. I’ll link a few of my favourites below.
Space eye mask from @lobellaloves. My absolute favourite, go to eye mask and so cheap too!
This is possibly the most important. I know it’s probably the most laughable too. Time, what even is that? I run out of it on a daily basis. BUT, if you make something a priority, you’ll have the time. Guaranteed. And you, you should be a priority for sure.
The rest is so easy to do, light some candles to set the mood. There’s just something super relaxing about sitting in a bubble bath in candle light. Give it a try, there’s no chance you won’t feel relaxed, promise.
Put some of your favourite music on. It’ll be even more of your favourite when there are no children crying in the background. I often just YouTube spa music, I know totally classy but hey, it does the job. If you’re feeling lost of what to listen to here’s what I normally go for —
Then, when you’ve set the scene and you’re soaking in the tub, put on your face/eye masks and justtttt relax. Honestly, it is just bliss and one of my absolutely favourite things to do.
I aim to do a pamper night once a week, even more times if I’m feeling adventurous. My skin, my body and my soul thanks me for it and yours will too if you incorporate one every once in a while into your busy schedules. I can’t stress enough how important it is for you to just be you, focus on you and prioritise you every now and again. You don’t need to go somewhere to pamper yourself, you can do it in the comfort of your own home when your children are fast asleep. It really is that simple.
If you’re a spa night lover like me, what are your favourite ways to achieve the perfect spa night?
Sometimes tantrums are a given and unfortunately you’ve just got to let your kiddiewinks ride them out, even if it is in the middle of the supermarket. We’ve all been there. Recently, I’ve been trying to see if there’s anything I do that doesn’t necessarily help the tantrum throwing stage. Now, I know that I’m not going to stop them completely, tantrums are like a way of life for toddlers. But, if I can try and prevent them as much as possible than we’re on to a winner right?
1) Step into their shoes. Even if it’s just for a second. Sometimes their demands may seem unreasonable, to you but to them it actually means the world that they pick up that dirty piece of rubbish off the floor to play with, so when you say no they just don’t understand. Before you lose it too, evaluate the whole situation and try and understand that they don’t understand why they can’t do whatever it is you’ve said no to. Appreciate that if you were them, at that age you’d probably want to do that too (maybe, or maybe not. Not sure rubbish ever appealed to me as a child).
Sometimes the little monkies have no reasoning and just throw a wobbly simply because they’re tired or whatever. When it comes to that, like I said previously just let them ride it out. Or you could always throw a tantrum too, I feel ya. Tantrum stage is H A R D.
2) Explain, explain, explain until you are blue in the face. They may not understand right away but I absolutely promise you one day, it will finally sink in and you’ll be able to do the parenting win jiggle! I hope you all know the one. If you don’t, shame on you! You’ve been missing out. Introduce the parenting win jiggle into your life now, you’ll be happier for it.
When Esmé is trying to tip all the food out of the boxes into the kitchen and add a bit of squash to the scenario, I’ve started trying to explain why I don’t want her to do it. Instead of just saying no, I simply just say “mommy doesn’t want you to do that please because…..”. Sometimes she gets it, sometimes she doesn’t. It’s the way of life. Persistence is key when it comes to parenting.
3) Give ultimatums and follow through with consequences. My little is only 17 months old so I’m not too brutal with this one but I still use it and she does understand. If she’s starting to throw a massive wobbly, I take a toy or something she is holding and tell her “mommy will have this then” to which she obviously says no in the most dramatic way possible, (even if it’s just a wooden spoon? Kids.) and I reply with reasoning “well stop doing……. please. And mommy will give it you back”.
Works like a gem, majority of the time but not always. Take each time as it comes. Note, I always use my manners. If I want respect from my children I must show them respect too. Which leads nicely onto my next tip.
4) Breath. It’s SO easy to lose our cool in these sorts of situations, just breath and stay as calm as possible. You’ll both be happier for it, trust me. This is possibly the best advice I could ever give. Sometimes I go and scream into a pillow because this child has thrown about a gazillion tantrums in half a day. BUT some days, reasoning is on point and I feel like a parenting god. Take each day as a lesson because we’re all learning here. Every day is a new day.
5) Give them some love. When it’s all blown over give them a kiss, a cuddle or play their favourite game with them. Show them that good behaviour = happy mommy/daddy and that is a very good thing. Children need love and attention and lots of it, you can never give too much.
Little E pushes my buttons to no end but I love her and I make sure she knows and feels that every single day. She’s not an angel, she’s cheeky, crazy, mischievous and full of character. I wouldn’t have her any other way. Now, I am by no means a parenting expert but these steps really work for me and I hope they help you in some way too.
Here’s hoping tantrum days come and soon! Happy parenting my loves ♡
All mamas out there will know that on most days we don’t get chance to spend very long on our hair. I L O V E trying out different hairstyles and it’s even better if I get them done in limited time. That is definitely a mom win!
I have three hairstyles that are my favourites. I try to mix things up a lot and try all different ones but these are easy, quick, and practical. If I can save five/ten minutes on my hair and still feel good then we’re on to a winner!
Hairstyle one: All hail the mighty mom bun. I think this one is probably a well known one for all mamas out there.
Super easy, quick and definitely practical. You know when babies get into that hair grabbing stage? This is the bomb digity hairstyle for that my friends. Up and out of the way. Looks great with minimal effort, yes please!
I tie my hair in a pony, bring my two for fingers on my left hand to in front of the pony and wrap the tail over. Twist my hair around and pull my fingers out while holding with my other hand still. Then I fold it onto my head and mess it around a little bit. Secure it with a bobble and then I bobby pin in different places until I get the affect that I want. Pictures for a demonstration of the twist steps are below.
You really cannot go wrong with this one, pin your bangs back into a fringe, curl some bits and leave them out, style your bangs in and straighten them. Literally can mix it up anyway you want. Mom buns are life. Easy life.
Hairstyle two: (this may require overnight action).
I LOVE this hairstyle because you can mix it up so it looks different but is actually exactly the same. Too good to be true, right? Fear not ladies. Introducing, the some up pony? Some up some down? Not actually entirely sure what this one is called but we’ll roll with it!
With this hairstyle you can change it up which is why I like it so much. You can have your hair curly, poker straight orrrr beach babe waves. The one that takes the least time is the beach waves, just pop your hair in French plaits the night before.
This one is suuuuper easy. You literally just grab the top section of your hair so that it is even around your whole head, making a pony with the top part of your hair and pop it into a hair tie. I like the pony to be quite high up on my head as you can see in the photos above. I then mess the top section of my hair up a tiny bit to give it a little volume.
In the top right photo I have taken a small section of the hair from the pony and wrapped it around the hair tie so that you can’t see it and just bobby pinned it in place. That’s again, just a different spin on the hairstyle. This one also has the hair out of your face a little so if you have hair pulling babies this one is also a good one, if you don’t fancy the mom bun.
Hairstyle three: (this requires overnight action)
Pop your hair into French braids the night before. As you’ve probably noticed, this is one of my favourite things to do because all I have to do in the morning is take the hair ties out, poof my hair about and ta daaa, ready for the day. Except, with this one you just add a couple of braids in the morning and it’s like a whole new look! Winnerrrrr! I’m all for easiness here.
Grab a section of hair from each side of your face, it can be as small or as big of a section as you’d like. Depending on how chunky you want your plaits to be. Plait both sections and wrap them around the back of your head so that the sections end on the opposite side of where they were plaited, pin them into place.
I like to open the plaits up a little bit and mess with the top bit of my hair to give it a bit of a natural, messy look. But this is totally variable so can be done exactly how you like it.
Sometimes I do a fishtail braid as well which looks super affective, super easy and I always get lots of compliments on it. Can’t go wrong with that really.
We’ve got to make this mom life a bit easier on ourselves. I love trying out new hairstyles so if you have any good recommendations leave them below and I’ll give them a try.
I hope this makes your crazy hair days a little more easier to manage with a little hanging off your leg! Remember my loves, you deserve some you time and to feel good about yourself too. ♡
I know, I know, you’ve probably read the title and are thinking, alone time as a mama? Does that even exist?
When I say alone time I don’t mean, a whole day or two to yourself. I mean maybe an evening when the kiddies have gone to their grandparents for the evening. Or even just when they have gone to bed. You know, that time when moms everywhere hope that is not a broken sleep night. And when that shuffle you heard upstairs is in fact just them having a dream not one stirring, about to wake up. We’ve all been there I’m sure.
Alone time even comes if you’re a lucky enough mama that your baby naps during the day. Even if it’s just an hour, that my friends is alone time and us parents have to take all of the alone time we can get. No matter how short. Alone time means me time and I’m not going to deny it. Sorry, not sorry.
I think as parents, every living minute we spend devoted to our children. Making the best, most happiest life we possibly can for them so every now and again, I feel like we have the right to be “selfish” and think about ourselves a little. Which actually isn’t selfish at all may I just add.
I do a lot of house chores when my little is awake, she enjoys helping me. So, I’m keeping her entertained, teaching her aaaand cleaning the house at the same time. Winner winner. Am I right or am I right? So, in my alone time I do things that make me happy because I sure as heck deserve it and so do YOU. I recommend giving this a try. I promise you won’t regret it. Take some time for you, no matter how small because you are important too.
Watching a favourite programme/movie of mine is one of my favourites. When do you ever get another chance to watch one uninterrupted? Never would be my answer so I take full advantage. There’s nothing quite like watching your fave movie with snacks you don’t have to share. AND without watching the same movie on repeat because your kiddie just can’t get enough of the movie trolls.
Paint my nails, fake tan, face mask. You catch my drift. If you’ve read any of my previous blog posts you’ll know that I’m big into pampering. It’s so much better with some of your favourite music on, no crazy kids around and timeeeee. I know, I know. It’s hard to fit everything in but even if you do something different to pamper yourself each day you WILL for sure feel better about yourself.
N a p. Ohhh the holy grail of all choices. Some days, I forget everything else and just catch up on the all important z’s. There’s no shame in this for me and I enjoy every single minute. How do we expect to look after crazy little’s if we don’t properly look after ourselves?
Eat that gorgeously hot meal. How many times have you cooked yourself a meal and then had to shift your attention to your little? By the time you get back to your meal, it’s cold. And it just doesn’t taste the same once reheated. It’s no lie that I’m a MAHOOSIVE foodie so, food plays a massive part in my life. This is also one of my favourite things to do. (As you can tell, they are all my favourites because they are all as important as the other). Try it, you might just become a foodie too if you’re crazily not already.
So to all you child carers out there. Of course I’m not saying to put yourself above your child but definitely don’t put yourselves too far below. You work hard, crazy, long hours 24/7. No one can deny how hard it is and you deserve to do something/anything for you. Next time your lucky enough for your little to be sound asleep? Take some you time and don’t feel guilty. Your heart, mind and soul needs it, believe me.
I’ve recently had a lot of discussions with different mamas that are finding this whole motherhood malarkey super hard and sometimes feel scared to open up about it. Sometimes as parents, we feel like if we say how much of a difficult day we’re having or that we’re struggling it makes us bad parents. Is that what you’ve been thinking? Well, I want to put a stop to that right now. This is to all parents, especially mamas, because we’ve ALL been there.
I like to keep things real. So, as much as I LOVE being a mom and feel like it’s my calling in life. I also have the worst of the worst days too. And if you’re sitting there thinking you’re alone, stop. Because you are most definitely not. I promise you that every parent in the world has had their days/weeks/months where they thought they were failing at this parenting business with plenty more to come. And that is absolutely normal.
Just last night I wanted to have a tantrum myself after little E woke up crying for the tenth time in the space of two hours. As much as I love being a parent, I know that bad days come and I don’t beat myself up about that. Children throw tantrums, it’s a given so prepare yourself for it and don’t ever beat yourself up about it.
Some home truths are, children cry, they get sick and are grumpy just like we would be, they sometimes don’t understand why they can’t throw themselves into the pond with the ducks, they absolutely don’t want to leave the park even though they’ve been there for hours already, and they don’t understand that what was their favourite meal is now something they refuse to even put near their mouth. Yes, they push our buttons. Buttons that we didn’t even know existed. But, let’s be honest, they pull on heart strings that we didn’t know were there either.
Being a parent is a choice you make every single day. To put someone else’s happiness ahead of your own. To teach the hard lessons that they are struggling to understand and to do the right thing even when you’re unsure of what that is. But most importantly, to forgive yourself over and over again for doing things “wrong”. Well, your idea of wrong anyway. Because as long as your kiddiewinks are happy (majority of the time), safe and loved then you are doing everything absolutely right.
You will never have this day with your little ones again. Tomorrow, they will be a little older than they were today. Today is a gift as is tomorrow and the next. Just breathe, take in every moment, study their faces and their character and their teeny feet. Pay attention and relish in the charms of this moment. Enjoy today, it will have passed by before you know it.
I know that sometimes when you’ve been stuck inside the same four walls with poo-namis and tantrums galore that it can feel like your world is so small with no escape. Let me just remind you, that you are the world. You are the only world that your little ones revolve around. You are their comfort, their safe place, their home. You are everything to them and I hope you remember even on the hardest of days, just how special you are. Especially to your little people.
Hiiii everyone, hope you’re having the best start to your week!
Esmé has always been a good sleeper, she slept through the night at around four weeks old and it was A-MAZING! However, every once in a while she likes to throw a spanner in the works for a couple of weeks and makes me a complete mombie.
One night in particular I wrote a little diary of what was happening, something I could look back on fondly (jokes) and something I can show her when she’s older so she can appreciate how much I love her. I wouldn’t lose sleep for anyone else, fact.
It’s 22:44, I’ve been awake since 05:45am this morning, done a twelve hour shift and I. am. dying. Esmé has woke up three times already and I feel like I’m in for a LONG night! She wants snuggles and as much as I’m happy to give her as many as she wants… I neeeeeed sleep. Here’s hoping she settles, and soon. Fingers and toes crossed!
It’s 23:17 Esmé started moaning literally just a few minutes after putting her down and all I hear in the darkness of my bedroom is the (grumpy) hubs say “oh please shut up”. If that’s not top notch parenting then I don’t know what is folks, I’m sure it was said with love though, don’t panic.
It’s 23:27 and I’m in that stay in bed or get out, go check on her limbo where Esmé cries a little and then settles. We’ve all been there I’m sure. This limbo sucks. Just sleeeeep child!!
Esmé – 1 Mama – 0
It’s 23:42 and I’ve caved. I have a very sleepy toddler sprawled across me, if she’s so dang sleepy why won’t she sleep in her cot?!?!? I secretly love the unexpected cuddles but desperately want to resume my normal on the tummy, star fish sprawled sleep right now. Is it wishful thinking that hopefully she’ll be zonked soon and we can both resume into normal sleeping positions? Taking mombie to a whole new level right now.
00:48 and I’ve just put Esmé back in her cot whispered I love you through gritted teeth and gave her a kiss after being kicked in the tummy several times, I needed my bed back. I love her but boy is she pushing my grumpy, sleepy mama buttons tonight!
It’s 4:37 I thought we may have made it to a decent time until little E decided to cry “memmy memmy memmy” at the end of her bed, stretching her head around the ajar door trying to see if she could catch my attention. Kinda cute, kinda can’t even appreciate the cuteness through my half open eyes. I put some relaxing baby music on in hope that she’ll drift off into a deep sleep to the land of nod exactly where I want to be….
06:45 of course Esmé couldn’t possibly want a lie in this morning after very little sleep. Instead, she wants to play jump on mommy in bed. And so the day begins…
If you’ve had similar experiences to me, I’d recommend writing it in the journal how you’re feeling at that exact moment. I appreciate the nights she sleeps through so much more no when I read through nights like that. These kiddies like to keep us on our toes for sure, it’s a good job they’re cute and we love them eh.
Heres hoping the next sleepless nights are for a while yet and I hope all of your babies let you get a decent trip to the land of nod for the rest of the week (okay maybe just tonight because THAT is wishful thinking).